Im a 24 year old guy that started going for Ballroom and Latin dance classes. I did it to help me with my confidence. Most of the women at these group classes are middle-aged, while there are a couple that are my age. The couple of young girls my age, I danced with but both had an excuse that their feet hurt. These were at two different times. The first class, one young girl couldnt dance with me AT ALL because her feet were hurting her badly. The second class, I danced with another young girl and we danced for a while, but she had to stop because her feet were hurting. Now this is probably just an excuse. My mom thinks so because she said its the #1 excuse women make to get out of dancing. I even did some research and its true. When women cant stand dancing with someone, they say their feet hurt so they can break away. The reason young women are like this is because they want to dance with a good leader.

Now thats what I find strange. This is a BEGINNERS class. So, I dont understand why these young women cant be cooperative and dance with a man who is also beginning. Youre not going to find many men at these dance classes, let alone one that can lead like a pro. So, what theyre expecting is a bit unusual. At least, Im not stepping on her feet or anything. And I try to be gentle when dancing. Some men do step on feet and theyre rough when leading. And the instructor told me that Im one of these few men thats picking up real fast. So, I know I will dance well in no time. It just takes time. I just wish these young girls would give me a chance.

And its funny. When I dance with the older women (40+), theyre all perfectly ok with dancing with me. They know were all beginning and they appreciate my effort. Yet, the young onesforget about it.

So, why on earth are young women so picky with whom theyre dancing with at a beginners group dance class?

Because they are rude and don't think that the rules apply to them. Most of them seem to think that their skill is far beyond anything on Earth.

Stop asking them to dance. They don't deserve to dance with anyone.

Unless you have other intentions in mind, the age of your partners during a group lesson shouldn't matter. And it could be that the younger girls sense that you have other intentions in mind. That's not to say you do, but their perception is their reality. So keep that in mind. Otherwise, don't let it be a distraction of any kind. Concentrate on becoming a skilled and confident dancer, and partners who have the same goals and enjoy dancing will be available without much searching. You'll want a dance partner you are comfortable with once you move into one-on-one private sessions, if you go that route. This dance partner could be of any age. I have seen women 50 years old dancing with a partner who is 70, so there's no real "rules" in that regard when one is learning.

There is another possible angle on this sort of situation (and I'm not seeking to suggest that it applies in this particular case).

Women not infrequently dance because they want men. This is particularly true of an older generation, who sometimes want the men more than they want to dance. One is the means to another. If the man in question JUST wants to dance, the ladies may well (correctly) interpret the signals, and move on, to other prey. We men will usually do well to stay very well clear of such entanglements.

It can work the other way too, of course: the man wants a partner (a mate) not a dance partner. As long as each party is honest about what they want, there is no harm done, but there is a good deal of exploitation, of all sorts, in the dance world, as in the world at large.